Divorce at any age is life-altering, but when it occurs later in life — often referred to as “gray divorce” — the implications can be especially profound. As people live longer and priorities shift, many couples in their 50s, 60s and even 70s are deciding to part ways. Gray divorce can bring emotional and financial challenges, but with the right information and planning, it’s possible to navigate this transition with confidence and clarity.

What is a gray divorce?

Gray divorce is a term used to describe the end of a marriage between couples typically over the age of 50, and often after decades of marriage. As more people in this age group choose to part ways, the concept has become increasingly recognized. These divorces often involve long-standing relationships and shared histories, which can bring unique emotional and financial considerations — like jointly owned homes, retirement savings and adult children. Because the circumstances can be quite different from those of younger couples, thoughtful and personalized planning becomes especially important.

Considerations for gray divorce.

There’s no single reason why couples decide to divorce later in life — often, it’s a combination of emotional, personal and societal shifts that build over time. For many, gray divorce isn’t about conflict or crisis, but rather a quiet recognition that their needs, goals or sense of self has changed. Life at 50, 60 or beyond can look very different than it did decades earlier, and with that change often comes a reevaluation of what happiness and fulfillment mean. As a result, some couples decide that parting ways is the healthiest next step for both individuals.

Financial implications of gray divorce.

From everyday household expenses to your retirement income, a divorce can have a significant impact on your life. In some cases, the same income that supported one household will now have to support two, so the goal is to assess how both parties can have the best life moving forward. That’s why financial planning becomes crucial during a gray divorce. Here are some key steps to take:

• Take inventory of your assets, including houses, cars, collectibles, property, retirement accounts, investment accounts and life insurance policies. Make sure to pay attention to how items are titled — whether in your name, your spouse’s or jointly.
• Make a list of all outstanding debts, including mortgages, home equity loans or lines of credit, other loans and credit cards. Check credit reports for yourself and your spouse so there are no surprises about who owes what.
• Gather important documents, like tax returns and current statements for bank, retirement and other financial accounts. Make sure to note account numbers and balances. Also gather documents such as car titles, prenuptial agreements, wills and trusts.
• Review health insurance options if you’ve been covered under your spouse’s plan.

Consider your future financial plans post-divorce.

Once the dust settles, it’s time to rethink your financial future. Start by setting new short- and long-term financial goals based on your changed income, expenses and retirement outlook. Update your estate plan, including wills, powers of attorney and beneficiary designations. For example, do you still want your spouse that you’re about to divorce to serve as your medical power of attorney should something happen to you? Similarly, if you have a joint trust then it’s a good idea to rethink the successor trustee.

And it’s important to meet with a financial advisor to adjust your investment strategy and ensure your portfolio aligns with your new risk tolerance and lifestyle needs.

Other important factors that can impact your financial picture.

It’s important to understand what your assets are — as well as their value and liquidity, and any potential tax consequences. This helps you determine the settlement that’s right for you. For example, a piece of art may be worth a pretty penny, but unless sold, it’s not going to pay for your groceries. Some additional financial factors to keep in mind include:

• Understand how savings and retirement accounts will be impacted by the divorce: You may split your retirement funds, which means you’ll have a smaller retirement nest egg to draw from.
• Know what spousal Social Security benefits you may be entitled to: Couples married more than 10 years may be entitled to a portion of their ex-spouse’s Social Security benefits.
• Determine if you or your spouse is eligible for alimony and, if so, consider whether you’d rather have regular alimony payments, a lump sum, or a higher share of the family assets.
• Learn about divorce laws in your state and how they may impact an equitable division of assets. Most states have equitable distribution laws, which essentially say that property should be divided in a fair and equitable manner.
• Understand the impact on minor or adult children who depend on you financially. Are you paying for your children’s or grandkids’ education? How will divorce impact an inheritance?
• Consider the mortgage: If you keep your home, be sure you have enough money to cover the mortgage (if applicable), as well as maintenance and taxes. Review mortgage options, like a cash-out refinance or a buyout.

Moving forward with clarity and confidence.

Gray divorce represents a major life transition — and while the emotional and financial implications may feel overwhelming at first, taking a proactive and informed approach can help ease the process. Whether it’s reassessing your finances, redefining personal goals, or simply getting to know yourself again outside of a long-term relationship, there’s opportunity for growth and renewal. With the right guidance and resources, you can move forward with confidence, clarity and a plan for the future that’s truly your own. Your Commerce Bank advisor can help you navigate the journey.

Commerce does not provide tax advice or legal advice to customers. Consult a tax specialist regarding tax implications related to any product and specific financial situations.